A certain Boston Terrier I know loves to tear apart empty toilet paper rolls.
Our resident bulldog doesn’t believe in waiting until they’re empty.
WHAT: One Week’s Worth of the Mojo Toilet Paper Recovery Program
HOW: 75% of the humans in this household are male. After several years of close contact and careful observation, I have determined that males are genetically incapable of placing a roll of toilet paper on a toilet paper holder.
Sadly, this genetic disability leaves them with only two options: 1) place the roll of toilet paper on a nearby sink or stand, or 2) place the roll of toilet paper on the floor.
Guess which option our household males generally choose?
BONNIE’S REACTION: ANOTHER ROLL OF TOILET PAPER FOR CRYING OUT LOUD WHEN ARE YOU GUYS GOING TO LEARN!
SQUIRT’S REACTION: It wasn’t me!
TIGER’S REACTION: Squirt used the bathroom last!
HUBBY’S REACTION: Don’t look at me. I am exempt.
REPLACEMENT COST This was the worst week of Toilet Paper Death: 5 rolls at 45 cents each. I couldn’t even salvage them because they were kind of melted—partially dissolved under the corrosive power of Bulldog Drool.
LOL.
Bad toilet paper not putting itself on the holder. Bad, bad, and more bad.
Queen Burrito likes Mojo’s style. She just grabs the trailing edge and then runs as fast as her little Cavalier legs can.
Chaos. In paper.
Maybe you could do like a paper mache thing with them. Imagine all the school projects. A paper mache and dog drool ashtray!
Toilet paper rolls should be kept free to forage and hunt throughout the jungle of the bathroom as their natural instincts compel them to. And that is why I refuse to confine them in your so called “proper place”.
How would you like hanging on a wall all day, just spinning and spinning until there’s nothing left of you?
Savages.
Hooray! Johnny! You’re posting again! Seriously… I thought Debbie P. got you. (Either that, or a crazed Neighborhood Watch Captain.) Everybody go check out The Investigator’s Notebook right now!
Kait, I am loving the obsessive little Queen Burrito. Mojo has been taking notes on all her activities.
Pat, that sounds great, but I have no artistic talent at all! You do, though (as does the J-Man), so how about I mail you a bunch of solidified TP logs and you do with them what you will?
😉
aw sh*t… sorry, couldn’t resist
I can give my pup three chew bones and she will go for the sock every time!
My cat Miranda loves to do the same thing, only she figured out how to destroy it even whens its put away properly on the roll.
Its her anger management technique. If a dog comes over, that night the roll has been destroyed, if I don’t feed her at exactly 8 am, she destroys another roll. Or if for some random reason she is annoyed, the roll is destroyed.
Aren’t pets lovely!
Queen Burrito has been sneaking a read on all Mojo’s magestic behaviours. Oh yes. And Two-Toes, too. They’ve been whispering about a fan club.
If only I’d snapped the picture of the shredded pizza box, minus the pizza.
The joys of dogs with personalities. The cats… It would take days to recount their oddities.
You coulda’ had a Boston! Only empty rolls, only while teething…. hmmmmm……..
Wallly-Ru
I’d make the men use them anyhow….but then again, I’m really cruel (insert maniacal laughter here)
I’m with Bonnie C. here…and I understand the toilet paper dilema. Mine usually do the sink placement though. But little 4 yr old Evan usually replaces the roll. He enjoys it somehow…I’ll keep up praising him and maybe it will rub off on the other male beings?
LMAO! Nothing is sacred!
I’d make them use it Bonnie!
Maybe you can teach the males to shut the bathroom door as they leave? Yeah fat chance.