Super Sabado: The carnage continues

HUBBY: Mojo got another one.

BONNIE: I don’t believe it! How?

HUBBY: I don’t know how. But I got a picture of it! I caught him red handed! Heh!

When I got home, there it was, toilet paper everywhere. Photographing it was too much for Hubby, who was overcome by the crime scene and had to leave to do more investigative work.

Ah, well. As I sit on the couch, my toes wiggling amongst the viscera and other random shreddings of Mojo’s latest victim, I think to myself…

I could really use a margarita.

A DOUBLE margarita.

And on that note, I declare this a Goofy Super Sabado. Because I’m feeling goofy. Between all the toilet paper death in the last two weeks and the prospect of my firstborn behind the wheel of a vehicle that doesn’t operate by feeding quarters into it, I do feel goofy. So pass the chips.

I want double guacamole, too.

So how does one be goofy on a Super Sabado? By imagining how various favorite people really are in real life. Let’s start with someone I thought for sure was lost to Debbie P and her Galaxip Mega Death 3000: Johnny Undercover, the man behind The Investigator’s Notebook.

Mr. Undercover reveals all of Magnum’s secrets, including stuff Magnum never told you, like:

• How to survive surveillance in a sealed-up van. In Texas. In summer.
• What to do when you have to go to the bathroom whilst on surveillance
• How to get important information from… the pizza delivery guys

So. You can see Mr. Undercover is a rather ingenious private investigator. I figured he had an ingenious way to keep in shape in between all those sweat box surveillance shifts, and I found it: One of his secret workout sessions, recorded on tape!

Hey, you all say, that’s not fair. What about you, Bonnie? Do you have cameras recording your workouts as well? I do. But don’t watch more than a few seconds, as you may go blind. No, really. Only a few seconds. You’ll thank me.

Whoa, aren’t they all men?

Moving on!

Here’s an old home movie of my favorite joke teller Bonnie Calhoun, and boy, can that girl dance!

What about Pat Kirby? A security tape caught her flirtatious first date with the J-Man in the world-famous New Mexican Subway System.

Kait‘s man Dawg has a bit of a problem in the romance department, as is evidenced by this clip. Don’t forget to read about what happened when the water drained out of the tub.

It’s no secret Kitty loves cats. Here’s a documentary she produced about a little known aspect of feline management. No, really! That’s her work!

And here’s my favorite Aussie lady at the office, struggling with the copy machine.

It’s well known how much Podz dislikes the Apple Computer Co. If he were an iPodz commercial, I think perhaps this is the kind of iPodz commercial he’d be.

Lachlan has been flying high with the Seahawks, but I imagine her having just the littlest bit of sympathy for Redskin fans. Gee, I hope that kid’s going to be okay. Hey, doesn’t his jersey match that pizza box?

Mimi might find this use of the Force interesting, considering this post.

Dennie needs some mental viagra to get back to writing. This soothing, pastoral scene should get her creative juices flowing again. Relax, and turn your volume up, Dennie, because the sound isn’t the best.

Susan at the Church of Angst has just a baby bulldog in the house, but I imagine he’ll be doing stuff like this in no time at all.

And April of Desperate Writer has been having problems writing queries. I say what she needs is a good cheerleader—heck, maybe even an entire cheerleading section, just for her!

Okay, that’s it… for those of you who hung in there until the very end, here’s something fun, especially if you have kids or nephews and nieces who ask you crazy questions like, “If we dug a hole in the back yard that went straight through the earth, where would we end up?”

Now you can show them. In my case, if I started digging I’d end up in smack in the Indian Ocean, along the Southwest Indian Ridge. So put away those shovels, boys.

Have a good week, everybody!