Monday Morning Mojo: Liver Treats

Mojo

You might think this is the look of love. It’s not.

It is the look of a bulldog who seconds ago was fast asleep upstairs—his nose buried deep in a pile of stinky teenager laundry—when a human hand lightly brushed against a plastic pail kept in a kitchen cupboard, causing said bulldog to launch himself free of gym socks and boxer shorts, hurl himself downstairs, skid across the living room floor and slide into the kitchen/family room.

Behold, O Dog Owner, the only thing greater than yourself—in your dog’s opinion, anyway:

Pail of liver treats

I’m telling you, if Timmy’s mom had a bucket of these babies in the house when it caught on fire, Lassie would’ve dragged it out first and that would’ve been the end of the television series.

Hubby uses the treats to try to help Mojo learn some self control around food. I say good luck with that. When it comes to liver treats and our bulldog, there is no self control; there are only massive puddles of drool all over our laminate flooring.

MOJO: He’s headed for the cupboard! He’s—YES! LIVER TREATS LIVER TREATS LIVER TREATS LIVER TREATS LIVER TREATS LIVER TREATS LIVER TREATS LIVER TREATS…

HUBBY (puts treat on floor) Mojo, sit!

MOJO: Hooray! (lunges at treat)

HUBBY: NO! SIT!

MOJO: Sit?! But a liver treat IS ON THE FLOOR!

HUBBY: Stay!

MOJO: It moved! (lunges)

HUBBY: NOPE!

MOJO: It moved again! (lunges)

HUBBY: NOPE!

MOJO: It’s running away! (lunges)

HUBBY: NOPE!

MOJO: It’s escaping! (lunges)

HUBBY: NOPE!

Mojo: 'Do ya feel lucky, treat? Do ya?'

16 Replies to “Monday Morning Mojo: Liver Treats”

  1. Ah, bless him. He looks so cute again! Dog Simone is with me as I write and she is very interested in that photo of the pail of liver treats!

    On another matter, you asked me a couple of weeks ago if Sicilian men appreciate the older woman. I missed the comment because the computer was being repaired at the time. The answer is that you don’t become invisible as an older woman like you do in the UK – I don’t know how it is in the States – so when I find my very own Rossano Brazzi, you’ll be the first to know!
    Love and a big hug for Mojo.

  2. yes …”close” may not count in horse shoes but it has to in adorable dog training.

    I’d stuff him full of liver treats AND flup his ears.

  3. ROTF….both hubby and I laughing hysterically. Of course, I was laughing so hard hubby kept saying “are you ok?”…..

    I love it!!!

  4. Hi, I found your site through Dooce…and now I’m hooked. I think I love your Bulldog almost as much as I love my Basset Hounds, of which I have 3. An older male and then 10week old sisters..lol..

    Anyway, very nice site!

  5. I felt so inspired by your pooch that I wrote (and pitched) a christmas story and the hero has a ….. *drumroll please* bulldog – hehehe – I’ll let you know how it goes!

  6. bonnie– where’d ya get that bucket? i’m sure auggie would love to have a pail too 🙂

    it is amazing though..the selective hearing of a bulldog….auggie will flat our ignore that i am speaking to him, sometimes stare off into the distance like he simply doesn’t hear me but the SECOND a mozarella string cheese package is opened….LOOK OUT. He could hear it if he were in another house down the street. Little shit. 🙂

    I LUB MOJO!

  7. Oh, I adore that smoogie face. I wonder if my old hound would actually reach a state of alertness bordering on wakefullness if I waved a liver treat under her nose.

  8. ack! sorry apparently I dipped a little too deeply into the pink wine yesterday.

    I meant to say: “close” may only count in horseshoes but …etc. hahahaha

    Anyway, Mojo is adorable and reading about makes me smile. Thanks for sharing him.

  9. Hey, there, Bernita, Honey, and Kristen… I always look forward to seeing your names.

    Welshcakes Limoncello, I do believe older women are invisible here in the States, too. It’s good to know Sicily isn’t as backward!

    Squirrel and Dink: you might stuff him full of liver treats ONCE. Then you’d spend some time cleaning up the digestive ramifications and you’d realize liver treats are best given as sparingly as possible!

    Heh!, Laurel Wreath and Jaye!

    Thank you for dropping in, Sandy. Did you see Heather’s photographs of Basset Hounds a couple of weeks ago?

    Bonnie, the Mojonator ALWAYS wins!

    Michelle, one day we’re gonna take you up on the offer and then you’ll be sorry!

    Dennie, oooh, I’d like to see that story! I hope it gets snapped up somewhere!

    Susan, they used to sell even bigger buckets at Costco, but not anymore. Now we get them at Petco. But you can’t get Auggie too many, or you’ll have to buy him some Kaopectate, too.

    Hey, there, Ms. Karen!, even the cats love these things!

    Hi again, Dink! I also meant to say the ear flupping is always allowed.

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