2006 – Ballpoint Wren

12/29/2006

Getting ready for our New Year’s Day Brunch

I’ve been cleaning like a mad woman. This is because on New Year’s Day we’ll be having lots of people over for our annual brunch—and rather than let guests see how we really live, I’d much rather they see how we live after a week-long cleaning marathon.

Hopefully I’ll be back online in time for the Monday Morning Mojo, but we’ll see.

In the meantime, happy new year to everyone! I was going to provide Abba’s “Happy New Year” song, but I like this song of theirs so much better, so here you go (link for feedreaders):

Blue eye shadow alert! Aw, what the heck. Let’s make this an Abba marathon:

“The Winner Takes It All”
“Take a Chance on Me”
“Fernando”
“Knowing Me, Knowing You”
“Super Trouper”
“Chiquitita”

12/26/2006

Is it art? Or is it crap?

A little discussion I had recently got me thinking very seriously about what constitutes art and what doesn’t. And “very seriously” means I thought about it whilst scarfing down the 82% dark chocolate bar I ate to keep me from eating the whole plate of my neighbor Linda’s Christmas cookies.

But back to the topic at hand: Art.

I don’t think of this as art, yet clearly it is considered Art with a capital A by Art Experts—who, when you think about it, must do a lot of soul-searching whenever they have to use the rest room.

By the way, I realize I’ve just outed myself as one of the unwashed, chocolate-swilling masses who can’t tell a urinal from a pivotal piece in art history, but as long as there is chocolate in my pantry, who cares?

Anyway. According to this quiz, I may not get confused in the rest room, but I’m not a total loss at art appreciation, either.

12/24/200612/24/2006

Monday Morning Mojo: Christmas 2006

Mojo with his Santa hat

12/23/2006

A Message from Mojo: No Super Sabado this week

Pensive boy

Did you know “Procrastinatress” is Bonnie’s middle name?

Bonnie Procrastinatress Wren.

That would be her.

She is running around like the noodle she is, trying to get everything done, including last minute presents and last minute Christmas cards—and who are we kidding? Let’s just call them “Last Minute New Year’s Cards,” okay?

Oh, and don’t forget the quickie, last minute housecleaning for some company we’re having this afternoon. That means no Super Sabado this week.

In the meantime, you can visit all her friends in her sidebar, who are much better organized than she is and who probably give their dogs LOTS more liver treats than get passed out around here.

Come to think of it, if anybody wants to pass out some liver treats just let me know. I’ll drag my bed over to your house and move in.

12/20/200612/19/2006

God bless us, every one

Mojo in front of fireplace, Hubby's crutches leaning against mantel

I couldn’t help it: I saw Hubby’s crutches leaning against the mantel and thought of Tiny Tim.

Mojo is acting all sincere and everything, but honestly, he is SUCH a faker. This isn’t his “God bless us, every one” look—it is his “What are you going to do with that liver treat?” look.

If I waited another minute to take the picture there would’ve been about a quart of drool on the floor. I bet Dickens never created a character who could do THAT.

12/19/200612/18/2006

Snowcraft: take that, you snort boys

I want to thank Lesia of Biography of a Southern Writer for finding this game and and sending me the link, thereby saving me lots and lots of time, which I hope to use to get the rest of my Christmas cards out before Valentine’s Day. Yay, Lesia!

I did do a little homework about it, though (just so you know I’m not a total procrastination loser) and learned that this game first saw the light of day in 1998, when IconNicholson sent it out as their company Christmas card.

Okay, so let’s get down to some serious snow fighting business!

At first I kept getting slaughtered by the little guys in green, who like to snort-laugh after they whup your hiney. Then I discovered that if you throw the snowballs while you are moving, somehow it packs a bigger punch.

Yeah, well, that’s the theory, anyway. Unless I’m constantly on my guard I usually end up like this:

12/18/200612/18/2006

Monday Morning Mojo No. 61: Mojo’s Christmas Carol

Goodness, I barely made it out with this one!

Talk about rush jobs… we had fun all day at the Wren Family Christmas Party, got home late, and then I had to put something together real quick. Nothing like PLANNING AHEAD.

You can launch the comic either by clicking on the image to the right or this link.

UPDATE: Sorry guys! Some of you might not have read EVERY Monday Morning Mojo I’ve ever written. Heh!

So if you’re a little confused about one of the plot developments, read this.

12/16/200612/18/2006

Super Sabado: The man, he is IRKSOME

If I’ve learned one thing from my man’s recent knee surgery, it’s this:

The day he retires is the day I move out.

I mean, he’s sweet enough, all right. He’s my man, and he’s injured. I want to take care of him.

It’s just that… he can be so … ANNOYING.

BONNIE: Your omelet is right here, sweetie. And it’s a beauty. Here’s a fork and a napkin, too. You’re all set!

HUBBY: Thanks! It looks great! Um, you forgot the salt.

BONNIE: Right there beside you, dear.

HUBBY: Oh! Thanks. How about the pepper?

BONNIE: Next to the salt.

HUBBY: Boy, aren’t you efficient! Heh! And the coffee?

BONNIE: If that coffee pot was a snake, it woulda bit ya. Darling.

HUBBY: And the cream?

BONNIE: JUST LOOK AROUND FOR CRYING OUT LOUD CAN’T YOU SEE THE CREAM RIGHT BEHIND THE COFFEE POT????

HUBBY: Huffy, huffy! Okay, I see it. Thanks. And now… I’m looking… I’m looking… I’m looking… but I don’t see what I’m looking for…

BONNIE: Just tell me! What is it you want now?

HUBBY: The tabasco sauce?

BONNIE: ARRRRRGHHHHHHHH! (goes the refrigerator, gets the tabasco sauce, and slams it on the TV tray)

HUBBY: What? What’d I do?

When he’s slaving away in the office, he comes home and the laundry is done, dinner is ready, and the sweatshirt he left on the floor has mysteriously made its way back to a hanger in the closet.

But for some reason he seems to feel that since he’s home and can watch the process, the magic won’t work. Therefore, the household is going to fall apart unless he tells me how to do everything.

HUBBY: I was afraid we wouldn’t get up in time today so I set the alarm.

BONNIE: Really? I didn’t hear the alarm go off.

HUBBY: That’s because we got up on time after all! But then I forgot to turn the alarm off. I think it’s going off now. Would you mind going upstairs and turning it off?

BONNIE: Sure! (starts upstairs)

HUBBY: (calling from downstairs) There’s a little slider button on top of the alarm clock, right now it’s slid over to the position marked ON. You just slide it to the left, to where it says OFF.

BONNIE: I’m gonna kill him.

Lucky for me, I have several hours a day out of the house, where I wait at the pool for swim practice to finish, otherwise I might’ve committed Hubbicide this week.

HUBBY: Where are you right now?

BONNIE: I’m at the pool. Why?

HUBBY: Oh, nothing. I’m just wondering… are we going to eat dinner tonight?

BONNIE: (growling)

HUBBY: What was that? I couldn’t hear what you said.

BONNIE: Of course we’re going to eat dinner! We eat dinner EVERY NIGHT!

HUBBY: How am I supposed to know that? You’re not home, nobody’s home, and nothing is cooking right now!

Oh lordy, I do hope I get a female judge.

Today’s Super Sabado is still about Continue reading “Super Sabado: The man, he is IRKSOME”

12/15/2006

All I want for Christmas…

… is a man who can get stuff for himself.
Hubby's knee: before and after

That black thing he’s pointing at in the “After” picture is an electric refrigerated cast, a device my engineer hubby immediately declared to be a marvel of science. Then the nurse told him he gets to KEEP IT.

Now Hubby believes there really is a Santa Claus, and her name is Rebecca of the Encinitas Surgery Center.

12/13/200612/15/2006

Getting my Glider on

I am late, yes I know I am, but I have a good excuse.

HUBBY: So. You’re not one of those women who’ll grope a patient when he’s unconscious, are you?

NURSE: Nope.

HUBBY: Damn. Who else is working today?

And my excuse is… Hubby had surgery today. Relatively minor stuff: to repair a torn meniscus.

And exactly how did he tear his meniscus, you ask?

He tore it during a basketball game that pit a bunch of 30-year-olds against a bunch of foolhardy 40-year-olds.

You’d think the 40-year-olds would’ve gotten slammed, but they won, and Hubby gave his meniscus to the effort.

I would love to tell you what A STUPID IDEA THIS WAS, but hey! I got to be supportive of my man. EVEN WHEN HE DOES STUPID THINGS.

HUBBY: So, Doc, will I be able to run marathons after this heals?

DOCTOR: Sure!

HUBBY: That’s great, because I can’t run them now. This surgery is really gonna improve my life!

So, I’ve excused myself… and here is our procrastination goody for today: a flash version of one of my favorite old Mac games: Glider.

If you ever played Glider, you know it had a catchy little tune and lots of fun sound effects, and basically consisted of trying to navigate your little paper airplane past air vents and over lighted candles and etc. When I saw it in a flash version, I couldn’t resist.

Via Digg