Remember

Let’s take a quick moment to remember that I did not want to own an English Bulldog.

Let’s remember that Hubby wanted an English Bulldog for years and years despite the fact they have health problems, are difficult to train and are famous for being really stinky.

Let’s also remember that I finally had to accept the fact that Hubby would not be denied, and after years of waiting, he got his English Bulldog.

Remember that Mojo is Hubby’s dog.

Everybody remember all this? Okay. Let’s move on.

Yesterday evening our English Bulldog pup, Mojo, woke up from his nap and all hell broke loose.

He ran outside and vomited all his dinner. Then he had a major case of the squirts. He rested a bit, seemed better, and then repeated the cycle again. For the next hour or so it was Vomit, Squirt, Rest and Repeat.

I kept an eye on him while I made dinner, but by the time it was on the table I was in a full-blown panic.

Me. The person who DID NOT WANT THIS DOG.

When Mojo finally came back inside, he sat in his bed and stared at the couch. When he began to groan, that did it. I got his leash and nothing short of a meteor crashing through the roof and driving my head into my pelvis would’ve prevented me from taking him to Doggy ER.

Hubby came home with the boys a few minutes later, just as Mojo started the Cycle again and upchucked all over the dog bed. I told Hubby there was no time for him to go with me, that I’d call him from the animal hospital.

Then I put Mojo in the car.

Important Doggy Transport Tip No. 1

When transporting a dog with an erupting digestive tract, enclose him in a crate rather than let him sit on the front passenger seat, where he will shoot approximately three quarts of diarrhea into your upholstery, car door, ventilation system, and seat belts.

After the Mother of All Squirts, I believe I broke a few speed limits. As I pressed down on the accelerator, I felt that if any cop pulled me over, he would’ve been overcome by the fumes long enough for me to escape and burn rubber to the veterinary hospital.

We were at the vet’s for a few hours. She couldn’t figure out what caused it. X-rays are clean; we think maybe he ate something at our Memorial Day Cul-De-Sac BBQ on Monday. Whatever it was, he’s no longer vomiting but his squirts have turned bloody and my little Mojo is as sick as a dog.

I had to leave him there, so I came home and scrubbed out my car. The hours spent waiting at the vet allowed it to congeal so it was pretty nasty work cleaning it up.

Did I care?

Nope.

2 Replies to “Remember”

  1. Susan, thanks for dropping by! They do have delicate digestive systems, don’t they?

    Edited to add: I fixed your URL. You forgot the ‘r’!

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